At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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