the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
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