Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize