Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
