Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
