using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
