Ketchup is God's man juice
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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