All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I AM VODKA MAN
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
