He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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