In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
