so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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