He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize