You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'm just crazy horny about you
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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