My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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