I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
