let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
