I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
