Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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