I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize