...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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