His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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