I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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