How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
