Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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