I wanna bring you to show and tell
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Randomize
