Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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