just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize