Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
