Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
