office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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