Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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