After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
