Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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