windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize