Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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