Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
