Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize