his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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