So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
