I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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