Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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