Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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