Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
