i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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