My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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