loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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