After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
