Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Two words: blizzard sex
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
