she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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