Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
