i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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