My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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